22 October 2010

I said it again...

...what I always end up saying and what always gets them running for the fucking hills.  Men, I mean.  Married men even more so.

"Make your mind up"

They seem to want to believe that they have no fucking choice in things, that they drift through life and things just happen to them, without their volition.  Innocent victims of their own magnetism.  The merest suggestion that they are complicit in their own lives, and not awash in a sea of circumstances is ignored if at all possible, shrugged aside or compartmentalized somewhere else that doesn't interfere in the here and now so they can carry on saying the things they say to me, doing the things they do to me.

And really, they ask, what is wrong with me that I can't turn a blind eye forever?  That I can't just keep on compromising?  Why do I have to hold up a mirror to their actions and make out as if they have done something wrong?  It's not like they've been caught, so it's not a real problem, is it?  Why can't I just go back to before and be an adoring foil for their ego? 

I do it so well.


Peeling Orange said...

I like the sincerity which is filled here.

Men are cowards, basically.

Gita Smith said...

well, when first you stepped into that man's sphere, you entered into an implicit contract, you see, and he thought "ah, here's a willing lass." Having agreed once to play along, you were expected to continue to play by his rules (don't call his house, arrive when the time suited him, don't make demands, don't expect him to take you out on New Year's Eve, and so forth). Rotten, bad, willful girl that you are, you wanted him to give you more more more. He, being still married, found it less fun as time went on and you wanted to be wanted body and soul.
Any questions?

toomuchpractice said...

Nope... a good summing up of the composite gentlemen in question, Gita ;)